So, we are several weeks into the new school year and you are having concerns about your child’s social adjustment…this is to be expected. Good news- here are 5 steps parents can take to help their child, whether it be in preschool or college, thrive in school.
1) 2-Ears: Open communication is so important in the parent-child relationship. Parents are encouraged to create a safe for their child to express their feelings and concerns. Parents should first LISTEN attentively to the concerns, worries, and emotions of their child. Then remind them that it’s totally normal to feel nervous or unsure when facing new situations. When a parent acknowledges their child’s feelings, they are providing support without problem-solving.
2) Routine: Encourage your older child or college-aged child to establish a daily routine. For your school-aged or pre-school-aged child, parents need to establish this routine. A structured daily routine can provide a sense of stability and predictability, which can help alleviate stress, worry, and anxiety. Examine the basic needs of your child or with your child, such as sleep [yep, I am back on sleep again] and eating. Having a healthy routine will contribute to your child’s overall well-being and resilience.
3) Social Connections: For older children and/or college-aged students, encourage them to get involved in extracurricular activities or with clubs that align with their interests. Joining these activities can be an excellent way to meet like-minded peers and develop friendships based on shared interests. For school-aged and pre-school-aged children, attend events offered by the school. Maybe, get a hold of the class list and invite all to a get-together at a local park/playground.
4) One Mouth: At the opposite end of tip 1 (2 ears) is 1 mouth. Parents are encouraged to offer suggestions after they have listened and determined that their child is looking for help. Offering suggestions when a child, of any age, is not ready to listen may lead to a fight. Instead, parents can purposefully teach and demonstrate empathy, engage in active listening, and practice effective communication skills. When your child is open to it, discuss different scenarios (that are relevant to the age and stage of your child’s development) as a way to help them practice these skills in a safe space. By giving your child these tools, you boost their confidence in social situations.
5) It takes a village: As parents, we can stay connected with the school community as a way to understand the school community and its culture. Attend parent-teacher meetings and engage with other parents whenever possible. Also, join the school’s FB group, follow the school on social media (Instagram and such), and join their email list. Building a network of supportive relationships with other families can help you stay informed about school events, activities, and potential social connections for the whole family.
In conclusion, it’s entirely normal for parents to worry about their child’s social adjustment. However, proactive communication, establishing routines, encouraging involvement in extracurricular activities, teaching social skills, and staying connected with the school community can all contribute to a smoother school year for all.