Happy Monday, my fellow fabulous parents.
This past weekend, I had a ton of fun at a recent 9-year-old birthday party. However, a revealing moment occurred. The helper at a really fun birthday party venue announced, “Ok girls, we are going to make chocolate!” One of the girls raised her hand and asked, “Is it going to be violent?” *My heart sank.
While it might sound amusing, this question actually highlights something important—kids absorb way more than we think. We all know, but don’t always remember that they’re constantly listening to the conversations happening around them. They are listening to discussions about the news or overhearing adult concerns. Even if they don’t fully understand, they pick up on emotions like fear or worry and try to make sense of them in their own way. I think of kids as having elephant sized ears.
In this case, the word “violent” could reflect anxiety stirred by overhearing troubling news or adult conversations at home. This is just my hypothesis. You see, children don’t always express their fears directly. Their fears and worries can surface in unexpected ways—like wondering if chocolate-making could somehow be dangerous. I know that you all would feel a host of emotions if you heard your child say this and it’s our job to shield the kids from topics that stick with them.
How Parents Can Help:
- Be Mindful of Adult Conversations: Try to keep heavier topics—like violence, conflict, or stressful news—away from young ears.
- Give Simple, Reassuring Answers: If your child overhears something, offer a calm, age-appropriate explanation to ease their fears.
- Encourage Open Dialogue: Let them ask questions and share their feelings, no matter how unexpected they might be.
Children’s imaginations are amazing, but when mixed with adult worries, they can lead to unnecessary anxiety. So, I want us all to try to be more aware of what they’re hearing. And when they do hear more grown-up topics, can we guide them through them? This way, we can help keep their worlds a little less stressful and a lot more fun!
Back to the party- the girls had a messy, delicious, fun time.
XOXO,
Dr. Marnee